What Would Mandy Pepperidge Say?

That boy is a P-I-G PIG! We need to have a serious discussion about table manners and toddlers, and how those are two things that do NOT belong in the same sentence, paragraph...you name it.

We have been blessed with a great eater (knock on wood). We are not the people who, at this point, have to worry about if our child is eating enough. It's really not a problem. I suppose we could be concerned about fluid intake, but we don't need to be...he's hydrated.

The issue are the sports of food flinging, bowl dumping and cup dropping. Sports for which my child is on track for a berth on the United States Olympic Team. With meals, he usually dives in and eats. And then somewhere along the way, he will casually drop a piece on the floor. Followed by dramatically drinking from his cup, which is then also dropped on the floor. This is IMMEDIATELY followed by a crazy swipe of the hand and more food on the floor, at which point Jason and I are now diving across the table to pop off his tray and end the food olympics.

I visited school to secretly observe his lunch time to see if he was saving this amazing behavior for home or if he was treating his teachers and classmates to these theatrics. He did not disappoint. Today's lunch was chicken and dumplings, green beans and strawberries. He loves and will eat all these items with vigor. At school they have progressed to giving them food on paper plates, in bowls and with a plastic spoon...which is pure entertainment by the way. When I arrived and peered in the window, my child was holding an empty bowl of chicken and dumplings over his head with a sippy cup of milk laying on the floor next to him. Eight children at the table, seven cups on the table, one on the floor. Nice.

Then his teacher offered him additional chicken and dumplings. Which he ceremoniously lifted off the table and would have so dumped on his head had she not wisely snatched it from his mischievous hand. Seriously. My child' s table manners are a nightmare. We are doing everything we are supposed to be doing and it continues. I guess he's not the only one and that when I looked he was the only one that had the cup on the floor but there are five of them that do that. And only one of them actually uses the spoon. But I didn't see anyone else starting the food fight at Faber. All that was missing was a square of Jell-o to inhale.

On the upside, today he said please for the first time. So we've got that going for us, which is nice.