Walk, Don't Run

Jackson is running. He should not be running. He is not yet coordinated enough to do so. This does not seem to concern him. Windowsills, doors, high chairs...you name it, he will crash into it. His reaction lately is not to cry, but to become very angry. Once we determine he hasn't injured himself, it's quite entertaining. The other skill he learned is sticking his tongue out, which is hilarious. My parents are not as thrilled by it as I am, but I love it and think it's funny. I would be more inclined to respect their dismay had my father not taught him how to pull tissues out of the kleenex box. He can empty a box in a minute if we aren't watching.

Two days until my boy is one year old. How is it even possible?

Leavin On A Jet Plane, 2

This time it was Jackson. I didn't have the interest in noting that this last week's events led to Jackson's first ever trip on a plane. We were very nervous as everything was last minute and we didn't have a lot of choices as to when we could fly, nor could we really afford to buy three seats on the plane. So we went with the best times and had Jackson ride on our lap.

Our flight from Denver to Chicago...he couldn't have done better. He really was a dream. He didn't nap, but he didn't fuss at all, ate really well and was just really well behaved. The ride back from Chicago to Denver was a slightly different story. He needed a nap, we needed a nap, and we were all pretty drained. He was crabby most of the way, but honestly he did pretty well. He finally fell asleep in my arms with about 20 minutes left in the flight and then slept up until he got in the stroller. When we got home he went right to sleep after dinner and was great.

All and all, given the circumstances, it could have been much worse and I'm proud of him for a good job on his first plane flight. Next time will be to Indiana for Jason's birthday and he will thankfully have his own seat :)

Say Goodbye

Today we bid adieu to my Grandma Dot. I post this on the Jackson blog because he was there and was a bright ray of sunshine on what was the sunniest gloomy day I've ever had. He was chatty at the burial and was there for mommy to hug. He was there at the service for all of Grandma Dot's friends to see...and hear. And also at the after party we held at Westmoreland where he walked around smiling and cuddling with family and friends alike. He was a tremendous comfort to me and my family during the saddest day we've had in a long time. He smiled all day. Grandma would have loved it.

So Much To Say

It's 11:54 on a Tuesday night and I'm writing a blog entry because I can't sleep. It's been a rough few days in the Lew household. I know this blog is meant to be about Jackson, and this will mention him in a way, but really...this post won't be. We lost Jackson's Great Grandma Dot very early Monday morning. She was my last grandparent. My Grandma was very cool. She came out to Colorado for a wedding shower my friend CJ gave for me in 2005 and she had just suffered a fall and had a black eye and wasn't happy about it. She came to the shower and had an awesome time. And all my friends at one time or another who attended that shower agreed that "your Grandma is so cool" which is not a thing one expects to hear really. With my Grandma living in Chicago, it wasn't as though a plethora of my friends had ever really met her at any point in my life.

I had the total out of town Grandma experiences that will forever loom large when I reflect on my childhood. Each summer, that was what we did. We visited Chicago to see Grandma and our uncles, and we visited Wisconsin to visit all the aunts, uncles, cousins and Omi. When we were in Chicago, we were at the green house on Bennett Avenue and played at the park on the corner of Bennett and Simpson. We got to know Grandma's friends the Bannermans, Mrs. Persons, Mrs. Keem and Lu. The highlight was always, ALWAYS the 4th of July at Lincolnwood School where my mom used to attend school as a kid. I loved the races there...it was like getting another field day, which to me was a very big deal. Then we would walk down to Central Street and watch the parade before going back to Grandma's and getting cleaned up to go to Westmoreland for the picnic. You remember things like getting the variety pack of cereal at Grandma's when all you got at home were Corn Flakes, Cheerios and Rice Krispies. At Grandma's we got to have Corn Pops and Froot Loops and Frosted Flakes! We got to go to the dime store and get a toy to play with during our visit! Uncles would take us to the Cubs game, and we'd borrow the Altschul's beach tokens to visit Lake Michigan at Lighthouse Beach. Then there are more recent memories, some of which suck. Grandma had a great time at Jason and I's wedding which was wonderful. Not so awesome when she tripped over a stair at my parents house and broke her hip. The only upside to this was that Grandma was stuck in Colorado with us, which meant we got to spend a lot of time with her. So that was an upside if there could be one. She would look out the window and tell us how she couldn't believe that we had blue sky everyday...she had no idea it was like that here.

One of the most recent memories I have of her was when I called her to tell her that I was pregnant. Jason and I were actually at the airport flying to San Antonio for my college reunion and I was 12 weeks basically that day. So I called and told her and she was so excited. Once she got the initial congratulations out of her, the first thing she really said was, "What does your mother think about this?" Which isn't funny to anyone but me and Grandma because I knew exactly why she asked me that. Going to her 90th birthday party last January and meeting all her friends again was a wonderful time. When my brother got home from that he got engaged. Which was fantastic for many reasons, not the least of which is that it meant Grandma was going to roll the dice on another trip to Colorado. Which I'm very grateful for, because it meant that she got to meet Jackson. That was a big deal to me, and if it hadn't happened then I hope it would have happened in the time since before Monday. I sent her literally hundreds of photos of Jackson, and thanks to Uncle Paul she got to see videos of Jackson in action on Easter. Which is more timing I am thankful for.

My way of dealing with any situation that I am uncomfortable in is with a self-depricating joke. It's automatic. If I don't like it, I will make light of it. I now know where this comes from and is a quality I appreciate having. It has traveled from Grandma to my mom to me. I find myself doing certain things that I am sure were things that she did.

When the phone rang on Monday morning I was in the shower. I was in the shower much earlier than I usually am in an effort to get the house empty of Lews in a faster manner. So I knew why the phone was ringing and who it was before Jason even answered it. I heard it ring once and turned off the water, threw a towel on my head and put my robe on and dripped down to the kitchen to get the phone from Jason. I already knew it was my mom and I knew why she was calling. It wasn't a phone call I expected to get yet. I thought we had more time.

But I am thankful for the time we did have. Grateful. We've had a heads up on this for a couple of months. I think the worst thing doctors can say is "at any time" because what does that mean even? At any time could be today at lunch or in 3 years. But the upside to the worst thing they can say is that it sure motivates everyone. I talked to my Grandma a lot lately, but I'm furious that my last chat with her was on Easter and that it was as brief as it was. My mom talked to her on Sunday night and gave me a recap and I decided I was going to call her the next day. I didn't get a chance...my mom called me first. The services start on Thursday and we'll take on the task of saying goodbye but really I am thinking of it more like a salute to Grandma. I'm very sad, but I'm very glad that I will have Jason and Jackson with me. It's not the occasion we had in mind for Jackson's first time on a plane. He is Dot's first great-grandchild and I'm glad he will be there to participate.

When Did I Get a Kid?

Because last time I checked, I thought I had a baby! Sometime in the last month, Jackson has morphed from a baby boy to a big boy. I don't know when it was...and there are still things I'm clinging to that are baby like. We still give him a bottle and he still has to lay either in our arms or lean on our knees when he has it. When he wakes up for a moment at 3 am and screams for whatever reason and we get to pick him up out of his crib and he puts his little head on my shoulder and calms down. Those are baby moments. They are the last ones...I have a little boy. He plays on his knees and tries to throw the ball to daddy. Instead of putting the toy truck in his mouth, he actually attempts to roll it on the floor. He feeds himself, and gets mad when we try to feed him sometimes with a spoon. He grabs the aforementioned bottle and plays with it when he's done. He stacks rings and blocks. He talks in the car. He dances! He makes jokes! He puts smaller toys inside bigger toys, and puts toys in the toy bin. He knows that when we come get him in the morning or after a nap that the blue blankie stays in the crib and hands it to daddy. He is a wonderful, wonderful little man. And he's still my baby.

Sweet Boy

Earlier this week Jackson and mommy met Dave Russell, who shot our wedding in 2005. He was hoping to meet Jackson, so we met him at Scott Carpenter Park in Boulder one afternoon to get them acquainted (and for Dave to do his awesome work!). The results were amazing...I can't believe what a handsome little guy we have and what great photos Dave took. I shouldn't be surprised, but it's so wonderful to see Jackson from someone else's point of view.

Easter Madness

It was Jackson's first Easter, and naturally I was going to pimp him out. There are far too many adorable Easter outfits for little boys out there for me not to. The choices ranged from the extravagant Janie and Jack to the basics at Carter's and Macy's. I went with an impulse purchase...a little sportcoat outfit from Target. He had no interest in any egg searching or holding. He just wanted to show off his new walking skills and chase the dog.

Walking, Day Two

Walkin on Sunshine

Wednesday, April 8. 4:49 p.m. Jackson walks. He and I were home playing waiting for daddy to come home and playing his new favorite "I scream when we play with this" ball popper machine.

We were picking the balls up and putting them back into the machine and dad came home from work. Jackson was about 3-4 feet away from me and had let go of the machine and was just standing there. So I put out my arms, with Jason standing about 10 feet behind me, and said, "Come and see me!" and he did! He took three steps all by himself and got to my arms and I scooped him up and we had a celebratory dance celebration in the kitchen. We do not yet have this on video but I bet we do by the weekend.

Now the fun begins....

Haircut Again

I decided that with Easter and birthday coming up it was time for a real live haircut. We went today, and it was great. We walk in to hear the beautiful sounds of Miley Cyrus blaring at the Superior Lollilocks. No appointment though, and they were full, so we had to go back at 1 pm. So we did, and Jackson did great! He sat in the booster seat and "read" a book while Jackie the stylist sprayed his head and cut his little hairs. He even sat still for the buzzing clipper as she did a cleanup job on the back of his neck and around his ears. Photos will be up later when he is up from his nap but I didn't want to forget to post this. He was a great customer and she didn't charge us hardly anything since it took about 2 minutes and he sat still and let her work. Hooray for good behavior = saved money!

Does He Or Doesn't He?

Mean it. When he says mama or dada. He says it literally all the time. They are the only word sounding sounds he makes. Last night I was leaving and he looked right at me and said mama and smiled. He waves like a maniac and says mama. He shrieks and says dada. But it doesn't seem that different from the first time he said either thing.

Not an Ear Infection

So today, on the eve of my son's 11 month birthday, I am here to report it's not an ear infection. It's a sinus infection...with a healthy dose of some BRUTAL teething. Poor little dude is all I can say. And the worst part is, it may not even just be the two front teeth...I think there might be two others joining the party.

He is on antibiotics, which have confirmed the sinus infection wholeheartedly. Now that his little passages aren't infected and swollen, the snot is literally POURING out of them. Keep Jackson in your thoughts...he could use some good vibes to help him sleep and eat without incident.